The Lochness Monster. The Abominable Snowman. UFOs. Personal cutting machines like the Cricut or Silhouette.
Some people believe those things exist, but I cannot verify. I’ve heard tales of these “personal cutting machines” – space-agey, Jetson’s-era gadgets which actually cut your designs out for you without the use of primitive stone-age tools like scissors, but I can’t be sure if they’re real, because I don’t personally own one.
First, find yourself some fancy little scrapbook paper. This is the pack I used for Weston’s banner:
Choose a piece of paper for each letter you’ll need. Let’s start with this one, because it’s pretty:
You’ll need circles for this, and since cricuts don’t exist, I recommend the ol’ flip-the-paper-over-and-trace-a-bowl technique. My circles are about 6 1/2 inches wide.
(I’m not actually left-handed. I tried to recruit my toes for this job, but they were busy knitting a sweater.)
Continue cutting out circles until you have one for each letter. Stack up all your circles and, using the first as a template, punch holes in them all.
Now for the letters. For Annabelle’s banner, I wanted the letters to be all white, so I used Photoshop to print each letter in light gray backwards, then cut it out and flipped it over so there was no visible outline. This font is called minya nouvelle, and each letter is about 4 inches tall.For Weston’s banner, all-white letters wouldn’t have stood out enough on some of the lighter-colored circles, so I printed them out with a black outline.
If you don’t have Photoshop to make your letters, you could just use Microsoft Word for this step. While you’re there, you should consider rocking some pretty radical Word Art, circa 1995.
Given the chance to create Word Art in 1995, this is definitely what my 5th-grade self would have created. Did anyone else have a SuperCrush on Jonathan Taylor Thomas? Come on.
(No? Me neither.)
(No? Me neither.)
String ‘em all up and hang ‘em. I stuck thumbtacks in the underside of my mantel, and tied the twine to those. Step back and admire your handiwork.
Finally, find ways to drop subtle hints to the world that any stray personal cutting machines which needed a good home would be very welcome and could live a happy life here in this house.