We’re making space for a baby again. Two years ago we set up this nursery for our baby boy.
And made space in our lives for the tiny bundle of poop and joy.
But now the nursery sits empty, a blank canvas ready to be made over for a baby girl.
My little boy’s furniture was hastily relocated to what used to be our bonus room, the decorating and curtains and details still to come. It’s a work in progress, but he loves his big-boy bachelor pad.
The baby swing and toys have brought down from the attic and washed, and piles of pink clothes sit ready to be worn.
Last night just a couple hours after I finally drifted off to sleep, Weston woke up with a sharp cry. It was unusual – Weston, my good sleeper. I went to him in his new room, woozy from sleepiness as I meandered down the hallway.
“Mama pick me up pweeze. Wanna sing songs.”
I move with him to his glider chair, where we shift and try to find a comfortable position, my bulging belly making it difficult. We settle in with his head resting sideways on my chest, his legs stretched over my thigh, and I sing to him: “hallelujah” over and over, by request.
Even in my sleepiness, I take in this moment. The weight of his head on my chest. The scent of his baby shampoo. The soft feel of his bottom in my lap. His tiny hand resting on my arm, his soft pudge under the cool smoothness of his dinosaur pajamas.
And I soak it up: this, one of the last times I’ll hold both of my babies in my lap this way, tiny unborn baby girl and little Weston in my lap. This moment of my little boy finding comfort in my arms, his breath gradually slowing and calming.
He’s been relocated to a bigger room, and soon the space in my lap and the space in my nights will be occupied by a smaller, needier person. I hope the moving and displacing of bedrooms doesn’t make him feel the same thing is happening to his little life. I pray his heart will be protected and prepared, that he won’t feel he’s been replaced. I could have a thousand children and none will be like this sweet boy.
We’ve settled on a paint color and bought paint for the nursery. Soon it’ll be painted, the new crib set up and baby girl clothes organized by size in her closet and dresser. Soon our lives will be occupied with another tiny bundle, but for today I’m soaking up every detail of my life as mama to one.
Hi, I'm Kelly. Glad you're here! This little blog is where I chronicle our efforts to fix up our beaten-down home on a tiny budget. We're not there yet, but here's a peek at the view along the way...
How lovely. I remember feeling so much the way you do when my 20 month old boy was on the cusp of meeting his sister. It’s a special time and I’m so glad you are appreciating this time with your little boy. Best wishes in the days ahead and I can’t wait to see some pinkness on this blog in the near future!
i actually cried reading this…. my kids are 17 months apart, so baby sawyer was still just a baby when emmy came along… i had a really hard time adjusting because i was fearing what i was losing with him. i don’t talk about this a lot, but am telling you because wjhat if….. what if you feel at all like i did when your beautiful baby girl is born? it took me time to bond with emmy… i didn’t feel that instant connection i had felt upon sawyer’s birth and it freaked me out. it just came later and took time, but she is my princess and i love them both with all my heart. i just wanted to tell you in case you experience anything remotely like it so you would know it was normal. i didn’t talk to anyone because i was afraid there was something wrong with me. i am sure on some level it was postpartum but it didn’t last long- maybe only a week or two. anyhow, i hope this doesn’t scare you- not meant to do that, but just meant to let you know you have a friend. 🙂 i am so excited for you, and your son is going to have a friend for life in that baby- that i am sure of. (also someone to beat on, but mostly best friends!)
This was very sweet! I had some of the same worries when my daughter was on her way, but in the end, we had no issues. We involved big brother in as much as we could and we didn’t have a single day of resentment or lashing out for attention from him. I know we were lucky but I wish the same for you!
So sweet. My husband took the day off yesterday to paint our nursery for little Harper (due May 25). Today, he will be putting together the crib and hang some pictures up. So excited for you and your family!
Loved this so, so much. My baby girl’s day of big sisterdom will come someday and I know I will feel the same way as you do. Soak it allllll in. XO
Soak it up, Kelly! Two is definitely harder…but wonderful. Enjoy and treasure these days!
Oh my goodness… that was so sweet! I hope that when I’m in a similar position that I can enjoy those little moments in the same way. Appreciating the present instead of constantly pushing myself onto the next thing.
Oh man, this made me tear up a little. Then I read it through again… it is a really lovely post. These moments with our little ones are so fleeting, it is so important to soak up every minute we can, even if it is in the middle of the night. You are obviously a wonderful mommy and that little Weston must know how loved he is.
Aw. This almost made me teary.
Awww, that brings back a flood of memories for me. As my now 14-year-old 6 foot man child just ran past me and out the door I remember the days before his baby sister was to arrive. I remember being so emotional and feeling so bad for him that everything in his little world was about to change. He handled it without a hiccup and I’m sure Weston will as well.
Sweet sweet post! I loved this so much. Maybe one day I will know what it feels like to shift from one baby to two. 🙂
Kelly, this was SUCH a sweet post. I have a feeling you’re an amazing mama of one and all future children will be just SO blessed to have you as their mama, too. Enjoy these last couple weeks!
Just beautiful.
my director at work just welcomed her little girl into the world this morning. she wondered the same for her 2 year old son, but i have never seen such joy on his face as the pictures of him holding/meeting his sister for the first time!
Hi I just found your blog and I am loving it 🙂 Your post made me weep…. Such a beautiful picture with you and your son. I’m sure he well be so excited to meet his baby sister.
Such a sweet post. I remember feeling the same. We move my son to a new room in preparation for the arrival of his sister. He, a boy, who didn’t like change. But he adapted. He accepted.
And then we had our ‘special’ play times and bonding times when new baby girl slept (a lot at first) … and then during nap times when it was mommy and me only time.
🙂
Linda
How sweet and how exciting! We’re getting ready for our third and I just need to enjoy having the two right now. Life goes by way too fast!
This is exactly what I needed to read right now. I’m experiencing the same feelings…In less than one month our 3 1/2 year old girl will have a baby brother. It’s hard to imagine being able to love someone as much as I do her.
You’ve got some incredible readers too. It’s nice and reassuring to see their comments 🙂
Good luck to you!
Aimee
Wonderfully Domestic
Very precious words….and so well said 🙂
I don’t have kids…but can feel your heart in this post. It is clear to see you are going to excel in the mothering of more than one thing…crystal clear.