T minus six days to magazine photo shoot.
The nearness of the impending photo shoot weighs heavy on my mind. I know I won’t find rest until I’ve clothed myself, so I venture out into the cold darkness one evening, my goal clear and my focus sharp. I make my way to the nearest hunting grounds and scope out my prey: textured tops, soft blazers and skinny jeans. I pounce on several options, knowing I can return whatever isn’t used.
I drag my spoils back to my hut and evaluate.
Sidenote: I pretty much opted out of fashion for my pregnancy and the 10 months since while I waited to lose the last bit of baby weight. What has happened to fashion in that time, you guys? I realize this is making me sound like an old, old lady, but I don’t “get” what’s in style right now. This mannequin? Really?!
T minus five days to magazine photo shoot.
My thoughts turn temporarily to my habitat. I realize cleaning is in order. The idea of transforming my currently very-messy, toy-strewn house into one of order and cleanliness exhausts me. I run one load of laundry and fall victim to procrastination.
T minus four days to magazine photo shoot.
The task of grooming begins. I carve out a small portion of daylight for a proper haircut and eyebrow wax. Beauty is pain. Beauty. is. pain.
T minus three days to magazine photo shoot.
I have cleaned two rooms. These are the two rooms which were most easy to clean, and which will probably stay closed during the photo shoot. Still, I applaud myself.
I step over piles of toys strewn around the downstairs and sigh a lot. I long for a pregnant woman’s nesting instincts. I do not long for heartburn. I do wish I had pretty pregnant-woman nails and hair, but not achy joints. I successfully spend 20 unproductive minutes distracting myself with thoughts of pregnancy and wonder how I got on this topic to begin with. Nothing gets cleaned.
T minus two days to magazine photo shoot.
Survival seems hopeless. There is too much to do. I despise my procrastinating tendencies. We move our attention to the laundry room, where my halfway efforts have come back to bite me. I only stenciled part of the wall and need to go finish it.
I’ll proudly have you know that “after” photo has been nominated for my prestigious Worst “After” Photo in the History of Blogging Award.
We repair a small broken portion of our drying rack. It’s probably impossible to see to the naked eye, but when Better Homes & Gardens comes a knockin’, we get to caulkin’. (Or something.)
T minus one day to magazine photo shoot
PANIC SETS IN! MUST CLEAN WHOLE HOUSE IN FIVE HOURS! There’s no time for food or sleep! I still need more clothing options! I have errands to run! WHY DO I PROCRASTINATE?!
THAT is the photo of the floor underneath our sofa (and a rare Superman sighting). The floor is SPOTLESS. You know, in case BH&G does a white-glove test before they let you be in their magazine. It’s a possibility and I don’t want to risk it. Do you guys need me to add a pin it button for that photo? Here you go: That’s going viral, I just know it.
T minus 12 hours and counting.
You talked me into it – I run out one more time for more clothes options:
The cleaning nears completion. For one HOT second, my house actually looks like my house tour page. Blink and you’ll miss it!
The shoot is TODAY!
I’ll be taking photos and will relay the full scoop later, but you can follow me on facebook and twitter today and I’ll try to share out progress throughout the day. Hope you guys have a fabulous Wednesday!