Let’s just put this out there: I am an awkward person. I collect embarrassing moments.

Like the time I was walking up stairs in a big crowd, fell UP the stairs, spilling my things everywhere. Picked them up and regrouped. Took two more steps and tripped AGAIN. The sympathy glances and “are you okay?”s just made it worse.

Or the (many) times I have tripped up airport escalators while carrying luggage which then tumbles down the escalator and continues tumbling downward endlessly while I fumble to regain order.

Or the times someone else would fart in class, and MY face would turn red. I was vicariously embarrassed, I guess? But who do you think gets blamed for the fart when everyone denies it, but THIS girl has a bright red face?

Pregnancy is not helping this issue.

My least favorite pregnancy symptom right now? Increased blood volume. Normally, that’s a part of pregnancy that women are probably not even aware of, but I am.

Because now? In staff meetings at work, when it’s my turn to share something, my face lights up like Rudolph’s nose. I flush all the way down my neck, my ears get hot and everyone wonders why Kelly is so embarrassed to speak in public? Why is she ashamed to share at staff meetings? WHY is her face SO RED?!

Not professional. Not cool. I’m so not cool.