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The “Almost” Lamp: A Tragic Drama


It was a moment suspended in time. A moment… of a lifetime.

I guess you never expect this to be the day your world changes forever. I was so naive then, as I strolled the lighting section at HomeGoods. So unexpectant, unprepared for this collision of time and space.

But then it happened.

Act One: The Find

There I was, in search of a decent pair of lamps, yet so afraid to hope. You see, I had been hurt and disappointed by the lamp department in the past – had my hopes dashed! – so I carefully guarded my heart.

But then! Shining from the far end of the aisle! I saw it! It was a lamp that, until then, existed only in my dreams (and at Jonathan Adler for $395.)

The whole world grew still, silent. My pulse quickened in my ear. Thu-THUMP. Thu-THUMP. Around me, I felt only… light.

(Maybe because I was in the lamp section.) (But probably not.)

It was beautiful. Textural. Interesting. On clearance. It was the one.

How do you know when you’ve found the one? You just know, guys.  You just know.

I knew it would live upon my sofa table in perfect harmony, casting its glorious light upon my living room.

If only… if only I could find its matching pair.

As I emerged from my temporary stupor, I leaped toward the lamp, released its plug from the outlet and gave it a tender, sweet kiss. Then I rushed to the checkout line before anyone could take it away from me.

Once home, I adoringly place my new find on my sofa table, stepped back and teared up a bit. It felt like home.

Act Two: The Search

Immediately I began frantically calling one Homegoods after another, in search of my matching pair. One by one, the rejections came, stinging me to the core.

“Sorry, we don’t have that.”

“No, nothing that matches that description.”

“I’m sorry. I don’t see any.”

With each “no” I received, a small piece of my heart died inside. I called every HomeGoods within a reasonable driving distance, and no one would help me. No one could find the missing piece of my heart.

Act Three: The Husband.

Still, I gazed lovingly at my new beacon of light, waiting for Andy to arrive home so together, we could sit on the couch, arm in arm, and perhaps recite poetry about the lamp and its beauty.

Maybe we could talk about all the things we would see by its light, tell stories about the memories we hoped to make in its presence.

Finally, he was here! I watched his face as he looked upon my new love, waiting for him to exclaim with joy!

His lips parted. I caught my breath.

“That is ugly. I hate it.”

There are two kinds of love stories in the world. Those that end in frolicking toward the sunset on a brilliant white stallion…

and those that end with broken hearts, leaving you changed forever, empty inside. This is the latter. My lamp is back at HomeGoods, returned like a discarded lover, waiting for someone who can give it the home it deserves.

They say, after all, that if you really love something, you have to let it go.

Who says decorating is not emotional?

Let's connect


  1. Haha! Love it. Next time, let me know about your search. I have two awesome Homegoods within 10 mins 🙂 unfortunately, I don't have your eye for pulling it all together 🙁

  2. rindercella @ neatheringourfest says:

    your husband is just plain crazy. that is a beautiful lamp!

    and OMG you are cracking me up. i'm trying to do that "laughing so hard my eyes are closed and watering and my shoulders are shaking but i am trying to hide it from the office peeps so they don't think im crazy" move. it isn't working. and they knew i was crazy a long time ago. whatev.

  3. Erin @ His & Hers says:

    My favorite part of this is when you say you're feeling light…maybe because you were in the lamp section. HA!

    I think that lamp is fab in all it's curvy glory, may it RIP. Good for you for taking Andy's opinion into consideration, though, as hard as it might have been…I've been there!! 🙂

  4. nouveaustitch says:

    So worth leaving the safety of my Reader to view in Safari so I could comment! You should probably start looking for a new hus…uh lamp.

  5. Bree Leonard says:

    what a glorious tragedy!! So sad!!

  6. InteriorGroupie says:

    this was a hilarious post – well done on making the most out of a traumatic situation! I quite like the lamp…and I think if you keep it around for another few days your hubby might see its beauty too…sometimes it just takes them longer than it takes us!

  7. Carol@TheDesignPages says:

    Oh, I have had exactly the same experience with that damn store. I have even gone as far as calling head office to track something down and was told they have no way of monitoring inventory…uh huh! Once you've been married a bit longer you may be keeping the lamp and returning the husband for foiling your dreams:)

  8. Anonymous says:

    good for you for caring what Andy thinks ! I too have to work with my husbands opinions, but that has kept me from
    some bad decorating a time or two 🙂

  9. laurenjanelle says:

    I really like that lamp. I'm sad to hear that your husband didn't. sometimes lamp pairs just aren't meant to be.

  10. My Beautiful Life says:

    That was unexpected! I'm so sorry-I thought the lamp looked awesome in your room.

  11. Kelly! I know you're in Georgia, but not sure if you were near tornadoes…praying that you and your family are all safe.

  12. What a surprise. I love that lamp but love your story-telling more. Sorry it didn't work out.

  13. Amanda @ Serenity Now says:

    Great story telling!! What is it with husbands and their sudden opinions on design? My hubs drives me crazy. 😉 I think the lamp was really cute, but hopefully you'll find an even better one!

    I featured your post today. Thank you for linking up with me! 🙂

  14. Returned?? Say it isn’t so!?!

    • Ahahaha! Oh god, I KNOW that feeling!! Although if it was up to me, I would have veto’d his decision – no way would I have returned something of that beauty. I will say this however – Wayne feels exactly the same about my coffee table. The coffee table I spent MONTHS searching for, that I drove in a DOWNPOUR, THUNDER & LIGHTNING to pick up. I’ve had it now for nearly a year and he still hates it (somehow I was convinced he would learn to love it). Guess what I’m getting? Yep, a new coffee table. Sigh. Sometimes it’s better to have loved and lost… xxx

  15. Yup a tear-jerker. Nothing worse than a husband who doesn’t like the wifes lamp. And speaking of that, the lamp sort of has/had a feminine shape, I’m surprised Andy didn’t just go over and caress it’s soft curves at least once before he told you how he felt. Perhaps it was a bit bottom heavy for him.

  16. You are a better wife than I am.


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