From the BlogSubscribe Now

One Large Regret, with Two Toppings.

A month ago, I could barely eat a whole sandwich in one sitting, but then I’d have to eat again within two hours to fend off the persistent nausea that comes with baking up a tiny bun. Nothing sounded good; food became a chore.

Then, out of nowhere, the craving hit:

pizza!

NOTHING sounded as delicious as pizza to me – ME, who used to only get out of bed in the morning for the promise that each day would bring at least three desserts!

Suddenly, I was a reformed dark chocolate addict, no longer a slave to Ghirardelli. I found myself shying away from my eat-a-healthy-meal-then-gorge-on-desserts ways. Sugar could no longer hold a candle to my new beloved: pizza.

Pizza and I became best friends. We frolicked giddily in meadows, hand in hand. We danced in the rain. We shared a spaghetti noodle lady-and-the-tramp-style and kissed under the stars. It was true love.
wild_flower_meadow_panorama copy
Yesterday, basking in the glow of new love, I decided to stop at Papa John’s for dinner. I’m out of town for work, so this pizza would be for me alone! Muahahaha! Even my newly food-vigilant husband couldn’t swat my hand away after too many slices! I would take that entire pie up to my hotel room and have a ravenous love affair where no one could see!

And, like a good American, I succumbed to the suggestive sell and said yes, I would like an order of breadsticks with that, and sure, I’ll take a free cinnamon dessert.

Finally, alone in my hotel room, I drew the curtains closed, opened the pizza box and partook. I ate two slices, then started in on the breadsticks. I ate one… two… five… six! Shocked at the amount of food I could consume, I wondered “Do I have room for the cinnamon dessert?”

YES! Yes, I did! I ate three pieces, then returned again to the breadsticks, dipping each one into the precious tub of garlic buttery goodness until it dripped in the liquid gold.

No longer considering calories, I was simply so stunned at how much food I could take in in one sitting, I kept going, no longer hungry but now curious if I even had a limit anymore?! I found no limit that night, and tonight I finished the last of the breadsticks and most of the dessert.

Now, the empty Papa John’s boxes sit there in the corner of my hotel room, very much part of my awareness, like some dirty one-night-stand with all the shame and regrets that implies.

Tomorrow morning, I’ll return to my organic milk, fresh fruit smoothies and all-natural veggie dishes, like a sorrowful prodigal with empty pockets, torn clothing and dirty feet.



Let's connect

Comments

  1. You're in trouble little girl. No more travel for you!

  2. HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA!

    I'm so sorry Pizza took advantage of you like that! What a dirty man!

  3. HILARIOUS!!! Though I'm jealous….nausea was my friend all the way to 20 weeks.

  4. ROFL!! You forgot the best part, the justifier: "But it's for the baby!" You're eating for 2! 😉 Oh, and just wait – it gets even worse when you're nursing!

  5. Name him Pizza. Has a nice ring to it.

  6. that could be your best blog. So funny. Why not name the kid Pizza?
    Casey could have written that story, pizza seduces him the same way.

  7. Okay, probably the funniest post I've ever read. Well done.

  8. Thanks! I haven't wanted another slice since that day. 🙂 Emily, I like your attitude: PIZZA took advantage of ME. That sounds right!

Speak Your Mind

*

Back to top          Privacy Policy          Copyright © 2013 View Along the Way. All rights reserved.          Contact Me