I know you’ve come to expect lighthearted decorating talk here at View Along the Way, but today we’re taking a dark turn…
…down a forbidden path…
…to expose dark secrets.
A inside look at the hidden underbelly of…
DUN DUN DUNNNNN!!!
Every now and then I get the sweetest emails from other mamas of little ones asking something along the lines of: “How do you manage everything – the kids, DIY projects AND keeping your house clean?”
Which always sends me into hysterical fits of laughter. You know who NEVER asks me questions like that? Anyone who knows me in real life. I shared my real (embarrassing) secret for a “clean house” in our Q&A video here, but this weekend I had the perfect opportunity to gather the evidence. To write the exposé. To pull back the curtain on just what goes on around here.
I have a fun event coming up which I’ll be telling you about soon, but as part of the event, I needed to take some new “pretty pictures” of my house, starting with the office.
First thing we did was clear the office of the piles of paperwork, stray dresser that needs refinishing, and train table. You know, to give the appearance of a calm, clean workspace without Thomas the Train chugging along under the desk chair.
Ahhh look! A well-kept home!
But JUST BETWEEN US, you can know that FOUR INCHES outside of the camera lens, everything we’d removed from the office had gathered, and this was happening.
Seriously: four inches.
Don’t tell anybody.
On to the living room! This photo happened…
In the midst of this:
I took that one with my phone so you can see… ALL of my decorations from that side of the room and from the mantle got recruited for this photo, so that side of the room is empty of decor, and the camera tripod barely fits around the jumper and other toys.
The crazy thing is, it’s not like my house looks like the house tour page sometimes, and other times looks like a tornado hit it. Sometimes, it looks like BOTH at the SAME time.
Here’s the spiffed-up half of my master bedroom.
And here’s the wall opposite the bed, the portion of the room officially designated for the storage of clean laundry that we haven’t put away yet.
(Once you make it official, it’s not messy anymore. It’s just everything in its place.)
I forgot to take a pic of the other half of the room, where my spare decorations live while they anxiously await their turn to be called into duty. But it’s there, friends. It’s there.
As soon as Andy came to bed that night, he removed EVERYTHING I’d put on his nightstand “to make it functional again.”
I’d like to conclude by saying that when you see beautiful photos of homes in magazines and blogs, you can know that all is not as it appears.
But I’m not going to conclude like that, because it might just be me. Maybe everyone else maintains perfect homes where the sofa has never seen a goldfish crumb, and toys are stored in their designated cabinets when not in active play. Where dishes are returned at once to the dishwasher and toilet paper holders never sit empty.
But not here. And that’s okay with me, because we really live here. We really use the ottoman, and not just for storing heavy coffee table books between reads. We really use the sofas, and not just for storing snuggies-masquerading-as-throw-blankets-which-appear-to-be-casually-draped-but-are-actually-painstakingly-arranged.
Please tell me I’m not alone!
P.S.: I can’t wait to tell you about the thing I was taking these photos for.
P.P.S.: I like putting my kids in dressy clothes for Easter. The weather was bad and we were late for church, so we just quickly snapped a couple pics in bad lighting. I might need to put them in their clothes again and take more.